MKR Mount Pleasant
by Father Maxwell
Summary: Imagine if Rayearth Characters were working at places in your town. Can't imagine? That's why I wrote this story! This is the infamous story known to all my friends and mentioned many times in
1. Episode 1: The Many Battles of Sandwich ...

Disclaimer: Many of these ideas don't belong to me, and were made up by my friends. I'm just the one who puts them into writing ^_^ Anyway, the whole "Eagle working at Subway" thing was developed by Darth Bond and CloudyNight. The Zechs beer hat was originally thought of by Pretti-Chibi, and further developed by DarkChild, CloudyNight, aaaaaaaannnnnnnnd..........me. LoL.  
None of the MKR characters in this belong to me, although I'd be the happiest person in the entire universe if I at least had Eagle and Lantis. Zechs doesn't belong to me, Subway doesn't belong to me, neither do Wal-Mart, Dominoes, the Chinese restaurant on Main Street, Sony, Taco Bell, Wendy's, or CandyLand. I just write psychotic stories that involve Magic Knight Rayearth people working at them.   
I got the whole idea for this from "Gundam Wing McDonald's", but I don't think this will be much like it. I didn't write that story, nor do I have any idea who did. I just think it's funny.  
  
And remember, all flames will be used to burn Fuu in my backyard!!!!  
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.....But I do own Nova's giant mustard super-soaker ^_^  
  
MKR Mount Pleasant  
Episode 1  
"The Many Battles of Sandwich Artists Eagle and Nova"  
  
  
(Scene is Subway, a normal Subway, not one of those dumb Subway Express things. Eagle is sitting on the floor, wearing a Subway uniform, with his headband thing complete with popper on. He is popping the popper)  
  
Eagle- Heh, heh, heh, hehhehhehheh.....  
  
Nova (runs behind counter from the ever-elusive back room) Hey Eagle, guess what?  
  
Eagle- (pop. Turns around) What?  
  
(Nova whips out Super-Soaker that is filled with mustard, and she has one of those mustard-filled backpacks on her back. She squirts mustard all over Eagle.)  
  
Eagle- AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!  
  
Nova- (Laughs maniacally)  
  
Meanwhile, next door at the Chinese place....  
  
Aska- Sang Yung! We need some more white rice! Elder! Are those egg rolls done frying yet?  
  
Sang Yung and Elder- Coming right up, Aska-sama!  
  
(Aska does evil laugh thing where she puts her hand over her mouth)  
  
(All of a sudden, a turkey sub with cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, and mayo appears in front of Aska.)  
  
Aska- Oooh, my favorite! (she goes to pick up the sandwich but it keeps moving away from her. She keeps following it and it keeps moving away)  
  
Eagle- (who is holding and reeling in a fishing pole) Heh, hehhehheheh. Get the sub, Aska.....he he he hehe.  
  
(Nova comes up behind him and squirts him with mustard. Eagle growls, then goes back to reeling in Aska's sub)  
  
Eagle- Heh heh heh......  
  
(Nova whacks Eagle in the head)  
  
Nova- Hey, fisherman! We got a customer!  
  
(Eagle stands up, wipes the mustard from his face, and puts on his cutesy eyes-closed smile)  
  
Eagle- May I take your order?  
  
Clef/Customer- Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?  
  
Eagle- No.  
  
Clef/Customer- Oh, okay. Well then, I'll take a 6 inch on white pizza sub with pepperoni, mozzarella cheese, sauce, mushrooms, and black olives.  
  
Eagle- Coming right up!  
  
(He goes to work, still with that smile on his face, humming "Run" and is not even paying attention to what he's doing. He then puts the sub into the microwave and puts it on for 2 seconds. 2 seconds later, it beeps. He takes it out, wraps it up, and puts it in a bag for Clef. Clef takes the sandwich, pays his $2.64, and walks happily out of the store. He doesn't know that Eagle gave him a ft. long on wheat Italian Sub with pepperoni, salami, lettuce, tomato, American Cheese and Italian dressing)  
  
Eagle- Pop, pop, pop. (he continuously pops the popper on his head)  
  
(Nova is sitting around, bored as ever, and Eagle continues popping. Suddenly, Nova is struck with a bright idea)  
  
Nova- Hey, Eagle! I bet I can drink more soda from the soda fountain than you can!  
  
Eagle- You're on!  
  
Ascot/Narrator- And the battle begins! Who will come out on top in the great soda drinking competition? Will Master Pimp Clef ever discover that Sandwich Artist Eagle has made a dire mistake in the making of his sandwich? Stay tuned for the next exciting episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant"!  
  
  
  
  



	2. Episode 2: The Outcome of the Contest an...

Inouva/Narrator- On the last episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant" the characters Eagle and Nova from Subway, and Aska, Sang Yung, and Elder from the neighboring Chinese restaurant were introduced. Nova challenged Eagle to a soda drinking competition, and he accepted! Now it's time for today's exciting episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant"!  
  
MKR Mount Pleasant  
Episode 2  
"The Outcome of the Contest and the Princesses from Dominoes"  
  
(Subway. A huge crowd of people is gathered around the soda machine, where Eagle and Nova have their heads stuck under the soda fountain. The people are led in a cheer of "GO GO GO GO!" by Zechs Merquise, who is wearing his beer hat and throwing pork rinds all over everybody)  
  
Nova- I.......can't.........drink..........anymore....... (she falls over. Nobody pays any attention to her and instead crowd around Eagle and throw pork rinds all over him)  
  
Eagle- Well, thanks everybody! Free subs for all!  
  
(Crowd cheers)  
  
(Dominoes, which is next door to the Chinese place. Tarta is kneading pizza dough, while Tatra hums to herself and puts pepperoni on pizzas in pretty designs)  
  
Tarta- Tatra ne-sama! Stop amusing yourself and work a little faster! We're on a deadline here!  
  
Tatra- Oh, Tarta, you worry too much. I'm sure the people will appreciate pretty pictures on their pizza. We should at least try to please the customers. (Giggles)  
  
Tarta- (Fumes) TATRA NE-SAMA! NANI YO?!  
  
Tatra- (Giggles) Here, Tarta, have some pepperoni. It will make you feel better.   
  
(Tarta storms off angrily to the back room. Tatra giggles some more and goes back to arranging pepperoni slices)  
  
(All of a sudden, a vegetable sub, 6 in. on wheat with Italian dressing appears in front of Tarta.)  
  
Tarta- Ooh, where did this come from? (She chases the sub out the door and down the street)  
  
Eagle- (Reeling in) Heh heh heh.....  
  
(Nova is suddenly un-unconscious and squirts mustard all over Eagle. The force is so hard that he gets knocked to the ground)  
  
Nova- I'll show you to beat me at soda drinking competitions!  
  
Eagle- No! Please! Stop! Have mercy, ple-e-e-e-e-e-ease!  
  
Nova- I show no mercy to those Hikaru loves!  
  
Eagle- Oh, please. Don't you think that's gotten a little old by now? We all know you're from Hikaru's heart, you hate everyone she loves, loves everyone she hates, and so on. Get over it!  
  
(Nova fumes and pumps up the pressure, knocking Eagle unconscious. Eagle has Kenshin's swirly-eyed "Oro" face.)  
  
Meanwhile, at Dominoes...  
  
Tatra- La la la la la.....Hey, I wonder where Tarta went. (Flash to Tarta chasing sub down street) Oh well, la la la la la....  
  
Clef/Customer- Excuse me! (Dings bell on counter) Can I get some service here?  
  
Tatra- Coming! Hi, welcome to Dominoes, how can I help you?  
  
Clef/Customer- Yeah, I ordered a medium pepperoni pizza about an hour ago and I still haven't got it.   
  
Tatra- Oh, gomen nasai. I'll have it ready as soon as possible.  
  
(Clef/Customer watches Tatra, and gets big lech grin on his face)  
  
Clef/Customer- Hey, pizza girl!  
  
Tatra- You mean me?  
  
Clef/Customer/Master Pimp- Course I mean you. Has anyone ever told you how sexy you look in that uniform?  
  
(Tatra giggles)  
  
Tatra- No, you're the first. Thank you for your compliment. (Giggles some more)  
  
Clef/Customer/Master Pimp- Hey, you know, that pizza can wait a little while longer..(He puts his arm around Tatra and leads her to the back room, her giggling all the way)  
Nova/Narrator- Oh no! Clef's pimping it over at Dominoes! I sure hope he comes over my way soon, gotta love that young-looking old man. (drools. clears throat) Yeah, anyway, Clef's pimping it at Dominoes, Tarta's chasing a sub down the street, and Subway's covered with pork rinds! Could this *be* any crazier? No? WRONG! It can, and it will, on the next seizure-inducing episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant"! (squirts mustard all over everybody)  



	3. Episode 3: Sailor Lantis and the Continu...

Lararga/Narrator- On the last episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant" we saw Eagle win the soda drinking battle against Nova. Tarta left her duty at Dominoes to chase a sub down the street, and Clef's pimpin it with Tatra! Will Tarta arrive back in time to make it a threesome? What new battles will Sandwich Artists Eagle and Nova engage in? To find out, keep watching, because it's time for today's episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant"!  
(Mumbles under breath) Man, that was lame...I'd better be getting paid for this.....  
  
MKR Mount Pleasant  
Episode 3  
"Sailor Lantis and the Continuing Subway Battles"  
  
Lantis- It's time to go to work! Sailor Lantis Power, Make-up! (He spins around naked while music plays and he gets dressed in a sailor suit, complete with short skirt and knee-high boots) Tra la la la la...  
  
Primera- Wait, Lantisu! Wait for meeeeeeee! Sailor Primera Power, Make-up! (Spinning around naked w/music sequence) Lantisuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!  
  
(Sailor Lantis prances off gaily to work at Candyland with Sailor Primera flying behind his shoulder)  
  
Sailor Lantis- Hi ho, hi ho it's off to work I go, off to work at Candyland, the land of hershey bars and spam...  
  
Meanwhile at Subway...  
  
(A battle ensues. Mustard squirts madly from one side of the room, and various vegetables, meats, and buns from the other)  
  
Nova- (tomato gets stuck in her hair) Oh Eagle, you are SO dead! (She proceeds to cover him with mustard)  
  
Random Customer who is not Clef, as he is pimpin it at Dominoes- Hey! Can I get some service here? (He is squirted with mustard and pelted with pickles and falls down, unconscious. The battle continues)  
  
Sailor Lantis- La la la, I love my job, candy is so good!  
  
Primera- Lantisu! We have a customer!  
  
Geo/Customer- Give me a minute, I'm not done looking yet. (Get gets some more stuff then puts the following on the counter- hershey bar, krackle bar, mr goodbar, box of jujubes, box of jujyfruits, m&m's, peanut m&m's, crispy m&m's, strawberry pop rocks, fruit punch pop rocks, caramello, bag of tootsie rolls, chocolate Easter bunny, cookie dough candy, peanut butter fudge...)  
Sailor Lantis- And will that be all?  
  
Geo/Customer- Nope, I'll take a can of coke too.  
  
Sailor Lantis- No! It's not safe to eat pop rocks and drink coke at the same time. They say a guy did that and he DIED. (Eyes get really big)  
  
(All of a sudden a girl with red hair and wearing jeans and a "Can't Sleep, Clowns Will Eat Me" shirt falls out of the sky and lands behind the counter. She gets up and brushes herself off)  
  
Dusk/Girl who fell from sky- Not true! I did that twice and I'm still here! Anyway, I'm off to Subway. Ciao! (She runs out the door)  
  
(Sailor Lantis, Sailor Primera, and Geo all sweatdrop and stand stupified)  
  
Sailor Lantis- Anyway, that'll be $89.76.  
  
Geo- No problem! Good thing Eagle always leaves money lying around the FTO.  
  
Speaking of Eagle.....  
  
Eagle- FTO...go! (pops his head) FTO...go! (pops his head) FTO...GO! (pops his head and knocks himself out)  
  
Nova- MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (Squirts mustard all over Eagle)  
  
Alycone/Narrator- Ick, mustard's such an ugly color. I prefer black, black like Zagato-sama's hair..aaah, so soft, oh curse that Emeraude! Zagato-sama's MINE! Oooh that little WENCH, I'll get her yet! (clears throat) Anyway, don't miss the next mental ward-worthy episode of "MKR Mount Pleasant"!  



	4. Episode 4: Ascot the Barber and Aska the...

Zazu/Narrator- Last time on "MKR Mount Pleasant" we met Sailor Lantis and Sailor Primera. Geo went to Candyland to buy some Spam...er...sweets, and Dusk fell out of the sky. Eagle popped his head one too many times and knocked himself out, because he's dumb. What kinds of hijinks will our characters get themselves into today? Stay tuned, and find out! ::drinks whiskey until he passes out::

"MKR Mount Pleasant"

Episode 4

"Ascot the Barber and Aska the Calendar Girl"

(Scene is barber shop. Ascot sits on a chair, eating Spam and reading "Formerly Short People Today" Magazine. Random customer walks in)

Ascot- Hello, welcome to Ascot's Barber Shop! What can I do for you today?

RC- I just want to have my bangs cut.

Ascot- NO!

RC- And why not?

Ascot- Why would anyone wanna cut their bangs?! Everybody knows peopel look better with long bangs!

RC- But I don't want long bangs!

Ascot- ::points to door:: Get out of my shop. Out. OUT!

RC- Okay, okay, geez. ::runs out the door::

(Ascot resumes his Spam eating and magazine reading)

Ascot- Cut their bangs, why would anyone ever wanna do that? What kind of crazy world are we living in today?

Over at the Chinese restaurant...

Aska- Sang Yung! Why don't we have more customers?

Sang Yung- I..I don't know, Aska-sama. Maybe...uh..maybe..maybe that calendar scares them away! ::points to the big Asian beauties calendar on the wall::

Aska- No WONDER! People don't wanna see those girls, they wanna see me! Sang Yung!

::Sang Yung rungs off and brings back paper and a brush::

Aska- ::sweatdrops:: Not that you meathead! Fetch me my camera! ::he fetches it:: Perfect! When I put pictures of me up over the calendar, nobody will be able to resist comign here! We'll beat Domonoes in sales in no time! ::flash to Tarta chasing sub down street:: Hey! This is MY evil speech! We don't need any Chizeta bimboes ruining it! Anyway, we will rule the fast food world! ::evil laugh thing::

(Ascot is still eating Spam, reading, and mumbling about people who cut their bangs. Random customer walks in, a different one this time)

Ascot- Hello, welcome to Ascot's Barber Shop! What can I do for you today?

RC- I just want a trim. But stay away from my bangs, I'm trying to grow them out.

(Ascot grins and leads RC to chair)

Ascot- Now that's what I'm talking about.


	5. Episode 5: The Insanity of Sailor Lantis...

MKR Mount Pleasant

Episode 5

"The Insanity of Sailor Lantis Part I"

(Scene is Candyland. Sailor Lantis is standing behind the counter talking to his unseen boss. Boss says something unheard and Sailor Lantis' jaw drops)

Sailor Lantis- What?! NO!

Boss- (...)!

Sailor Lantis- You can't be serious!

Boss- (...)

Sailor Lantis- But Candyland CAN'T close! Where am I gonna work? What am I gonna do all day? AND WHERE AM I GONNA BUY MY SPAM?!?!?!

Boss- (...)

Sailor Lantis- I...I can't believe it. Well, bye, boss.

Boss- (...)

(Sailor Lantis hangs his head and walks out the door, where Sailor Primera is waiting for him)

Sailor Primera- What's wrong, Lantisu?

Sailor Lantis- ::gets an evil gleam in his eye and clenches his fists:: They can't do this! Taking a decent, hard-working Ameri- er..person out of a job. I WON'T LET THEM AAAARRRRRRGGGH!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::runs down the street screaming::

Sailor Primera- ::blinks:: Lantisu?

(Boss walks outside. You can't see him though)

Boss- (...)

Sailor Primera- Oh, poor Lantisu! ::sniff:: Now where's he gonna buy his Spam?

Boss- (...)

Sailor Primera- I.....I understand.

Boss- (...)

Sailor Primera- ::blinks:: I though I was the only person in this story who wasn't addicted to Spam!

Boss- (...)

Sailor Primera- You're right. Let's go!

Meanwhile...

Sailor Lantisu...er..Lantis- ::is angrily storming down the street punching random objects:: THEY...CAN'T....DO THIS!!!!! NO!!!! ::storms into Subway:: EAGLE!!!!!!!!

Eagle- ::pop pop:: Oh, hi Lantis! Can I get you something?

Sailor Lantis- How about a job?

Eagle- ::Cute smile:: Oh, I'm sorry Lantis, but we don't have any positions open right now.

Sailor Lantis- ::grabs Eagle's shirt coller and pulls him against the counter:: What....did...you say?!

Eagle- Sorry, Lantisu!

Sailor Lantis- ::blinks:: What does everybody call me that? Ahem. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE ANY OPENINGS?!?!?!?

Eagle- I'm really sorry Lantis. But I'll let you know if we get one.

Sailor Lantis- FINE! ::lets go of Eagle:: ::glares:: I'll be going now. ::storms out::

Eagle- Come again!

Nova- You are so dumb. ::cracks Eagle over the head with her supersoaker::

Eagle- Oro...@_@

Nova- Mwa ha ha ha ha-huh? ::looks out window:: What's he doing?

Sailor Lantis- ::climbing the Doughboy statue:: I'll....teach....them.....

Nova- Or...o...::knocks herself out::


	6. Episode 6: The Insanity of Sailor Lantis...

MKR Mount Pleasant

Episode 6

"The Insanity of Sailor Lantis Part II"

Sailor Lantis- ::climbing the Doughboy statue:: I'll...make..them...pay..

Fred Luo- ::stands under Sailor Lantis and looks up his skirt:: Heh, heh.

Sailor Lantis- ECCHI! ::flings a rubber band at Fred::

Fred- AAH! The pain! THE PAIN! GEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNEEEE!!!!!!! ::falls over::

Sailor Lantis- ::sweatdrops:: What a weirdo. ::snaps back to attention:: AAAAAAAARGH! YOU'LL PAY, CORPORATE AMERICA!!!

(Eagle, Nova, Sailor Primera, Tarta&Tatra, Clef, Aska, Ascot, Geo, Zazu, and everybopdy else in this story so far crowd around the Doughboy)

Sailor Lantis- I'M GONNA JUMP!!!

Sailor Primera- LANTISUUUUUU!

Sailor Lantis- What do you want? I'm in the middle of teaching corporate America a lesson!

Sailor Primera- But Lantisu! You don't need Candyland!

Sailor Lantis- ::blinks:: I don't?

Sailor Primera- NO! You can buy your Spam from WAL-MART!

(Crowd excitedly gasps and whispers)

Sailor Lantis- Wal-Mart?

Sailor Primera- Stop repeating everythig I say! Dusk's fingers are starting to hurt!

Sailor Lantis- Sorry.

Sailor Primera- Ahem. Anyway, yes, Wal-Mart! Not only does Wal-Mart sell everything on the planet, they also have many job openings for people just like you!

Sailor Lantis- Job openings? Spam? I'M THERE! ::to sky:: SCREW YOU CORPORATE AMERICA!!! ::climbs down::

Ascot- Come on everybody, let's all go to WAL-MART!!

Crowd- ::cheers::

(At Wal-Mart)

Nova- OOH! Look at all the *MUSTARD*!!!!

Sailor Lantis and Ascot- SPAM!

Clef- Heh, heh. Lingere...::nosebleeds::

(Presea and Ferio, your friendly Wal-Mart employees, walk up to Sailor Lantis)

Presea- We heard you needed a job.

Ferio- We have an opening in customer services.

Presea&Ferio- ::In odd hypnotized voices:: Join us...you'll love it here...

Sailor Lantis- Alright! Sailor Lantis is back in the working world!

Presea&Ferio- Welcome to the team, Sailor Lantis ::evil smiles::

Sailor Primera- Come on everybody! We promised Dusk we'd end this season with a big musical number!

Eagle- Poppers everyone!

(Poppers appear on everybody's heads, shoulders, knees, and toes. Know what the big song is yet?)

Crowd- ::singing and popping:: HEAD, SHOULDERS, KNEES AND TOES, KNEES AND TOES! etc....

(After doing it a while they all run out into the parking lot for the big dramatic finale)

Crowd- HEEEEEEEAAAAAAD, SHOUL-DERS, KNEES AND TOES, KNEES AND TOES....HEEEAAAAAD, SHOULDERS, KNEES AND TOES, KNEES AND TOES...

KNEES AND TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eagle- Make sure to join us next season! What, you thought it wasn't gonna happen? Well you're WRONG! Dusk's already started on the first episode!

Nova- Seeeee yaaaaa.....::squirts mustard all over everyone and everything::


End file.
